Dear Spammy

I was going to post my response to a bloggers question: ‘what is writing?’ today, but I decided to slip in this instead. My response to the blogger will be posted next week.
The first email was sent to me by ‘Windows! Live’, ie Spammy. The email below was my response. I found it amusing at the time (oh look at me. I’m such a badass, talking to Spammy…). You may not find it amusing, but if one person can honestly say the laughed, or even smiled genuinely at my response, then it was worth posting. If not… let’s forget about this post, okay?

Dear Windows! Live Account User,
We encountered a problem with our database and a lot of records were lost, we are restoring our database to enable us serve you better. Your Windows! Live Account details are required so as to store in our database to keep your account active.

Failure to do this will lose his or her account permanently.
To update and enable us restore your account details in our data base to keep your account active, you are required to provide us the details below urgently.
Click the reply button to enter details below .

ID:
Password :
Date of Birth:
Country or Territory:
Occupation:
Alternative E-mail:

Make sure the details above are correct to enable us restore your account details, this will help prevent your account from suspending or closing.

Note: YOUR DETAILS WILL NOT BE SHARED.

Users have often told us that the more they use Windows! Live  Service, the more they discover its benefits. We’ll keep working on making Windows! Live the best email service around, and we appreciate your joining us for the ride.

Thank you,
Sandra O. John
The Windows! Live Team

My reply:


Hi there,

Thanks for letting me know that you lost your records. Good on you for trying to rebuild them! The new records must be so much more detailed than the last set – I don’t ever recall providing you with my occupation or country. But then again, I signed up for Windows! Live sooo long ago, you must have changed your records around.
I mean, when I signed up for Windows! Live, the exclamation mark wasn’t even apart of your name. It was just boring old Windows Live.

I suppose that when you lost your database, you must have lost your usual Windows Live (oops, that should be Windows! Live) email account and the pretty pictures you use. I’m so used to receiving emails from a different email account, I almost marked this email as spam! Imagine that! I could have lost this email address.

That said, I no longer want my email account. I’m sorry, but if even Windows Live (there I go again – forgot the new exclamation mark! Silly me) is using Yahoo as their new email provider, perhaps you know something I don’t.

For some reason, when I went to reply to this email, instead of putting the Yahoo address as the recipient, another email address (accounts.services0001000) was placed as the recipient. To make sure that the Windows! Live Team receives the email, I am sending this email to both email addresses.

Once again, thanks for being so kind and considerate by sending me this email.
I look forward to hearing from you.

Little Scribbler.

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4 Responses to Dear Spammy

  1. Feywriter says:

    I am so tired of getting these scam emails! So this made my day. Thanks for the smile. 🙂

  2. Whew. I was worrying no one was going to laugh/smile.

  3. You do know sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, don’t you? Just saying.

    Of course, that makes it appropriate in a response to a spammer – the lowest form of life.

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